I am unabashedly a huge fan of Joss Whedon. I always have been. I always will be.
But my favorite Whedon moment isn’t from Buffy, or from Angel (my favorite of his series) or Firefly, or Dollhouse.
It’s the scene above, from the Avengers, where Joss finally made one of the characters I always thought was a little on the hokey side (okay, okay, we get it– he’s Dr. Jeckyl) into something incredibly significant, at least to me.
For those who haven’t seen the movie– what is wrong with you? Go see the movie! But seriously, early in the movie Banner tells Captain America he has a secret to keep from getting angry and turning into the Hulk. The implication is that it’s meditation or medication, both things he did in the comics. But the answer is much easier and fits the current mood of the world so well. He’s not keeping from getting angry. He’s ALWAYS angry.
This scene meant so much to me because if you know me, people tend to think I’m a “pretty chill” person. My teaching persona is laid back, sort of the way I imagine I’d have been as a father, calm and patient with a sarcastic streak and bad jokes. Friends know me as the person who rarely loses his cool. I’m that guy. The one who sometimes gets accused of not taking things seriously because I don’t get wound up.
Only if you know me really well, you know that’s not the case. My mind goes 1000 miles and hour. I am almost always raging over something. I think people should do better and the world should be better and that people don’t get how simple things could be if they’d just slow down.
I stay even keel because I gave into it a long time ago. Anger is a gift. I use it as fuel.
But don’t ever mistake my calm for a lack of passion. I’m always angry, deep down to the bone. I might not turn green and break stuff, but you might not want to cross me never-the-less.
I think we’re all always angry. I just think some people can’t handle it. It’s like constantly being on fire and knowing you can’t douse yourself with water or you will die. So you smolder. It’s not comfortable. It’s not easy. But nothing worth doing or being is.
Admit that you’re angry, own it, and redirect it. Don’t let it consume you.
Banner didn’t. And he’s supposed to be a cautionary tale.