Time for a top 10 list. As Miami watches the class of 2017 disperse off into the world to do the amazing things they will do, I want to offer my last little bit of advice to my graduating seniors. Also know that I’m proud of you; you’re part of a grand tradition of excellence now. It’s time to take what we do here in Oxford and spread it out over the world.
So ten things to keep in mind:
- Leaving Miami doesn’t mean saying goodbye. You need to go and live your lives now, but it’s not like we’re slamming any doors behind you. Don’t hesitate to reach back to your alma mater and to continue to engage with the community. One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to forget that you have a support structure.
- At the same time, you’re not a student anymore. You will always be a learner, but don’t make the mistake of feeling tethered to your old habits. The transition from being a student to being a professional can be scary, it can be overwhelming, but it will ultimately be wonderful. Don’t be scared. Don’t cling.
- If you can, take a month just for you. Clear your mind a bit. One of the largest problems I see with young employees is that they go from working as hard as they can their senior year to catapulting into a job. The end of college can burn a person out. Let yourself rest a little. Recharge the batteries.
- Make a list of goals for your next five years and keep it somewhere that you will see it frequently. I recommend a white board on your home office wall. There’s a reason why people ask that sometimes-annoying “where do your see yourself in five years?” question in interviews. It isn’t, as some people fear, simply to see if you will express loyalty to the place you are applying with (they don’t want to hear you say “right here!” as if that is the correct answer). What employers want to see is that you aren’t stuck in the rut of thinking that life is going to work like school did, where every semester or at least every year your goals are placed in front of you. You’re an adult now. They want to know that you’ve thought about what that is going to mean and where you want to be. Also remember that you’re making a list for yourself and answering a question from someone who is interested; you are not etching into the fabric of time. You’re not locking yourself into a five year plan. But you want to have goals.
- Don’t be afraid to dream. Some people think that the end of college is the moment to “get real” and stop dreaming, but in reality, the moment you graduate and start looking at “the real world” is the perfect time to dream (I resent the implication that *I* haven’t been showing students the real world for four years, but I get the notion to say it this way). There’s a quote from Buffy the Vampire Slayer that really works to explain what I mean here. Buffy is speaking to Angel, a hundreds-of-years-old vampire with a soul, about why they can’t be together. She compares Angel to a cookie, which is out of the oven and delicious and ready for consumption. It knows what it is. But Buffy, who is just starting on her own path in life, is still cookie dough. She’s going to be a cookie, but it’s not really set what sort of cookie. The dough can still be modified and shaped and baked (or not– cookie dough is also cool, though I don’t think I should make a metaphor extend to someone eating Buffy right about now). What I mean is that we’ve spent our time as professors showing you how to temper dreams and to focus your ambitions and your passions. Use that power now– you don’t want to feel locked into a job in ten years and wish you’d chased your dream.
- Find a book to read for pleasure. Remember that books are meant to be this– something you read to learn and enjoy– and are not, in fact, torture devices meant to be skimmed so you can hope to follow class discussion. Don’t let college destroy reading for you. 🙂
- Make it a point to practice self-care. It’s easy going from college, where many of us live a life of “gotta keep doing work!” to starting work and not paying attention to what our bodies are telling us. Sleep enough. Eat somewhat healthy (says the fat dude). Nurture a hobby that isn’t your work. Take care of your skin, for the love of god.
- Once a month, do something you’d have never done other than because it’s time to do something new. Take a class in blacksmithing. Go berry picking. Visit a bowling ball manufacturing plant. Eat jellyfish. You never know when you might find something new that you absolutely love. My wife, for example, got me started using facial masks, and now I’m all like Tom Brady with that metrosexual skin routine action. Thanks to me, my wife watched a few hours of WWE and now shares my obsession with the squared circle.
- Humble up. This is my top advice for people, particularly people from a place like Miami. I know that most of you, like most of your professors (myself and my wife Julie both fall into this category) were the star student (or one of the star students) at your high schools, and in our program, most of you found your individual projects as spaces to be experts and to shine like the stars you are. This is great, and I absolutely mean it when I say that those of you I’ve worked with this year are amazing people, but this can lead to a weird sense in the real world. Let me put it this way: I’m a pretty smart guy. I can explain the cultural impact of the marketing and visual rhetorics used by Starbucks while I’m standing in line. That and the low, low price of $4.75 will get me an iced coffee. In the real world being talented is great, but it doesn’t make you better than anyone else. Knowing that, and walking in to situations humble and self-knowing, will do you well. No one wants to work with the hotshot, but everyone loves the person they know they can depend on. Be that person. All the time.
- Learn to say no. This is a place where I am telling you to do as I say and not, usually, as I do. It’s super healthy to learn to say no, though. And I don’t mean that like a parent to a child about things like sex, drugs and that crazy disco music you children are into (I mean don’t have disco sex with drugs, either)… I mean to people asking you for your time, to take on responsibilities, to be part of projects, etc. College is like a buffet bar for amazing experiences, and many people end up in like 30 extra-curriculars, with 2 or 3 majors/minors, etc. When you leave college, you have to slow that down a little. And I know you might say “but you said to dream big!” and I did, but I also mean to dream “focused.” Do not think you will disappoint people if you say no to a project or task. Do not think you are closing a door forever. You need to be smart with your time so that you can be as productive as possible. People– sadly– will not usually see your life in a holistic sense. They will know you in the capacity they know you, and much like when you were young and didn’t think your elementary school teachers went home from school, some people just don’t realize what else is happening in your life. Don’t count on them to know how you can use your time. Be protective of how much you can do.
Go kick ass, Redhawks. It’s your time.
And every now and then, if you see your ol’ pal Dr. Phill, give ‘im the wink and the gun so he knows you still know.
I’ll miss you all. Don’t be strangers.
I’m proud of you!